Love and Purpose

Love is a beautiful thing but never forget that you were made to do more than fall in love, get married and have babies. Those are all blessings from God but there is MORE. So much MORE and you can only experience MORE when you hold on to your purpose even when love comes calling.


To start off I'd like to tell you a story (I love stories). The story goes thus: There was a girl who loved books more than she loved boys. This girl would write down the grades that she wanted to get at the start of every semester.

I used to see this girl writing on her notebooks "books before boys" This girl had ambition ! She wanted to graduate with a first class from her department. Something that had not happened for more than two decades.

She was driven by this one goal for the first two years in the university, winning "best performing student" and getting monetary prizes.


By her third year though, a boy discovered her deep in her nerdiness. This boy could not understand why she had to study so much. He was always after both of them to go somewhere and have fun. She tried this for a few months before realizing that the boy and her were complete opposites and that sometimes opposites do not go well together. ..

By the time she ended things with him, the harm had already been done. Her grades had dipped a bit in the semester that “love” found her, so she could not make a first class like she had dreamed of.

I’d like to tell you another story… There was one young lady who was dissatisfied with how her minority tribe got sidelined again and again. She was determined to become an expert in her field so that her family name and her entire tribe would be a reference point.

Right after her M.SC programme, she wrote her PHD thesis and applied for PHD and God blessed her with an acceptance into a top university overseas.

She wanted to write academic journals that would not only add value to humanity, but would also be referenced by other scholars, thus immortalizing her family name. In fact, she told me that she would keep her family name in her writings instead of taking her husband’s name.

In the middle of making preparations for her scholastic journey, “love” came barreling down on her. Before you could blink, she forgot that she had wanted to get a PHD the way a desert wanted rain. She forgot that in her plans for her life, PHD was supposed to be center stage for the next few years.

I saw this girl abandon all her life’s plans for the fervor of a new love.   Suddenly all she wanted to do was marry this man that had stolen her heart. She did not ask herself why she was so quick to throw away her dreams for someone else.

To cut a long story short, the relationship ended some months later. By then it was too late, she had missed the funding for her PHD since she had not applied on time. She tried to defer the admission but the elite school did not grant that. In fact, her broken relationship did not just shatter her heart, it had killed her dreams too.

I’d like to tell you something else: The girl in both stories is ME! Yes you read right! ME! Love has derailed me more than once and this makes me the perfect person to be on this platform tonight to tell you : “Know your purpose so well that NOTHING can sway you from it”- Uyu Darling Ita. Yes that is my quote so be sure to quote me!

Anyway back to love and purpose… love is the most powerful force on earth. King Solomon wisely said that it is more powerful than death. This is why we must not allow love to sweep us away like a tidal flood because the devastation can be irrecoverable when it finally gets calm again.

In fact there is a saying that after your decision to follow Christ, the choice of the person to walk through life with is the next biggest decision in your life. In fact it directly affects everything about you: Your finances, Your well being, Your quality of life, the realization of your dreams and sometimes even your lifespan.

There is a  reason why there is “courtship” in a Christian union. It is during this phase that you should learn all that you can about your intended, particularly how well they fit into YOUR purpose. Do they see the future the way you do?

How will they help you achieve your dreams? Are they a blessing to your life and your future? As you pray and seek God’s face concerning your intended, do not ignore all the signs that show you that they are not going to be catalysts for your purpose.

I know some of you may be wondering “what is this purpose that she keeps talking about?” I think that is a subject for another day, if you are still unsure of what yours may be.

Back to my story though, no I did not make first class but by God’s grace I did make a distinction in a top ten UK University so I got another chance to do some things over. Also I realized that I did not need to have a PHD to immortalize my family name.

My books will do that. My presence on platforms just like this will do that. Again I got a second chance but don’t gamble on your purpose because sometimes you only get one shot.

In closing, always remember that you are WHOLE just the way you are. You do not need anyone to “complete” you. God does not leave things halfway done. The quicker you come to this realization, the sooner you will stop dumping your dreams on the sidewalk to jump on the love train. Trust me. I know what I’m talking about.

Love is a beautiful thing but never forget that you were made to do more than fall in love, get married and have babies. Those are all blessings from God but there is MORE. So much MORE and you can only experience MORE when you hold on to your purpose even when love comes calling.

I’d like to stop here tonight but before I go, get my novel here so you can see one woman’s journey in the rough road of love    http://bit.ly/AChanceAwakeningEbook7

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